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This is also why dating and relationships are so painful and difficult for so many of us, particularly if we had strained familial relationships growing up. Maybe you continue to call them weeks or months later, getting blown off over and over again, feeling worse and worse each time. In short, our unconscious is wired to seek out romantic interests who it believes will fulfill our unfulfilled emotional needs, to fill in the gaps of the love and nurturing we missed out on as kids. Annoyed likely. The right ones will pay attention and stay. And we stall. Footnotes Packard, M. Anonymous My girlfriend had just watched Apollo 13 before she came on skype to talk to me. Trying to do so is like trying to learn how to shoot free throws left-handed without ever actually touching a basketball. All of these issues have deep-seated roots in your unconscious, your unfulfilled emotional needs and traumas. It sounds simple, but why is it so hard? In fact, I objectified my sex life quite a bit and adopted some narcissistic behaviors in order to push me through some of these insecurities.
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About The Author
After 3 months of working tirelessly to try and get her over her ex and onto me she finally let me go down on her. As a result, I became highly sensitive to confrontation and any negative emotions of others. Turned out, the floor didn't creak and her grandmother walked in on us.
Psychologists believe that romantic love occurs when our unconscious becomes exposed to someone who matches the archetype of parental love we experienced growing up, someone whose behavior matches our emotional map for intimacy. Why dating and not, say, skiing?
Annoyed likely. People who had turbulent relationships with their parents, or were abandoned in a previous relationship, or tormented and teased when growing up — these people will likely find it much easier and more enticing to objectify and measure their sex lives than to confront their demons and overcome their emotional scars with the people they become involved with. An Invitation for Change I invite you to take some time and think about what your emotional hang ups are in this area of your life, where they probably come from, and how you could overcome them in an open and honest way.